Do the 7 Stages of Grief Exist?

Do The 7 Stages Of Grief Exist?

If you’re going through the grieving process, you’ll undoubtedly be feeling a mixture of emotional and physical symptoms of grief. You may be questioning how to deal with grief and how long you’ll be feeling this way.

That’s when some people turn to models of grief, such as Dr Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s 7 Stages of Grief, as a guide to understanding their reactions. However, this way of thinking and processing feelings and emotions (that aren’t linear) isn’t always the way to go.

How To Deal With Grief

There’s no set way or timeline on how grief manifests itself. How you’ll experience grief compared to the next person can vary wildly. Numerous factors can impact the way you experience grief, such as your relationship with the person, how the person died, mental health, and beyond.

Therefore, following a set grief model, such as the 7 stages of grief, can be more unhelpful than productive for some. One morning, you may feel angry; another, you may feel numb or sad. These feelings are valid and can happen at any stage of the grieving process, so remind yourself that if you’re not at a particular stage yet, that’s perfectly alright. It’s common to have questions such as “Do the stages of grief happen in order?” and “When is grief the worst?” Although, give yourself grace and be patient with how you feel.

If you’re in a constant cycle of wondering when the grief will pass or if you’re grieving “’correctly”, you’re not alone. Another theory, Tonkin’s “Growing around grief”, can symbolise hope for the future as it shows that grief may remain, but as you create memorable moments in your life and continue to grow, you can learn to manage symptoms of grief and find joy.

When Is Grief The Worst?

Grief affects everyone differently, which also applies to which stage feels the hardest. If you’re dealing with grief and thinking, “When is grief the worst? Commonly, the acceptance stage can be the toughest. However, the grief timeline and the feelings at each stage will differ for everyone.

What Are The 7 Stages Of Grief?

Grief is something we all experience, and it’s a natural reaction to loss. Grief doesn’t only happen after the death of a loved one; it can also occur after a severe illness, a separation or other life-altering events. If you’re wondering, “What are the 7 stages of grief?” Here they are in order.

Dr Elisabeth Kübler-Ross further developed the 5 stages of grief to expand on the intricacies of grief.

• Shock
• Denial
• Anger
• Bargaining
• Depression
• Testing
• Acceptance

Do The Stages Of Grief Happen In Order?

The 7 stages of grief can happen in any and every order. You may flip back and forth from one step to the next, and this is expected. Dr Elisabeth Kübler-Ross explains that grief isn’t linear, and you shouldn’t expect to experience all the stages in a set order. Some people may skip stages altogether or feel a particular stage more intensely than another.

Are The 7 Stages Helpful For Dealing With Grief?

It is argued that the 7 stages of grief and Tonkin’s growing around grief are too simplistic regarding its intricacies. For some, it might appear dismissive, overly optimistic, or not aligned with their experience. The above models can leave people with more questions about how to deal with grief and how long grief will last. Remember, if you’re unable to cope, unsure how to juggle the practical arrangements, or need a helping hand. We have resources below to guide you.

According to Bianca Neumann, Head of Bereavement at Sue Ryder, they would like to develop a modern, holistic model of grief that looks at the broader landscape and the differences in how we process grief in different cultures and parts of society.

Grief is often referred to as the price we pay for love, and the acceptance stage can be challenging to come to terms with as encouraging people to “get back to normal” or move forward can rule out many normal reactions that can creep in at any time in the future. For instance, special occasions, memories, and even the senses can trigger grief reactions. Therefore, learning coping techniques for grief or seeking support from organisations such as Cruse Bereavement Support or The Good Grief Trust can help you deal with difficult emotions and physical symptoms of grief.

Dealing with grief can leave you feeling overwhelmed and lost. If you’re feeling overcome with intense emotion or you’re not sure what to do after someone dies. Here’s a practical breakdown to navigate these events.